The Question

Well, back to what I will call the beginning of this African journey...

As a stay at home mom, my life was going to be changing as I had known it for the last 8 years. My baby boy was starting kindergarten. For about a year before this was going to happen, I started wondering what will this mean, and what am I supposed to do? I just had a feeling that I should be doing something more, but had no idea what that really meant?? Maybe it was a little bit of the mommy blues knowing my little buddy would not be with me anymore (Luke and I loved our Target and Scholtzsky's days). Maybe it was a little bit of guilt from all those people who think your job as a mom is done once the kids start school..."what are you going to do now"?? Or, maybe it was a gentle tug from God wanting me to seek him for an answer.

There were a-lot of circumstances going on around me too, and now looking back I realize these were not a coincidence, but God's way of starting to "connect the dots" for me. I had followed a friends trip to Africa with her family and thru that had started to read Katie's blog (go to Amazima on my page and check it out if you haven't...no words to explain). To top all this off, there were people all around me who were adopting or announcing by complete surprise that they were pregnant.

Well, as a mom who's baby was starting school, you can imagine what all this did. I started wondering again what all this meant? Was I doing enough? Should I be considering more children? Was this something I really wanted, or was it just emotions from everyone around me? Adoption? My mind was going in circles. Long talk with my sweet husband one day on our way to the lake. Bless his heart, I think he was a little surprised by all the questions on my mind... he offered to buy me a convertible to get over my mommy blues...lol. Not sure that he was questioning or feeling the same things, so we came to the conclusion to just pray about it.

So, in August when school started back I decided that one thing I would do with this so called "extra time" I would now have is to dig a little deeper in my quite time. I also decided to start a journal in the hopes it would help give me some answers to my questions. The first words I wrote in my journal were these...

What is God's will/desire for this next phase of my life?

Little did I know how quickly he would give me my first answer!!

A Backpack?!?!

I am going to start with what has been on my heart this week. As you will find out, there is A-LOT that God is teaching me, and he probably continues to chuckle as he just keeps asking me to step out of my box. If you know me at all, and have been anywhere with me, you would probably agree to say that I "over pack". Just in my nature to be prepared and have a choice if I need it. (I even take a little pride in being known as the one among my friends to have whatever you need either in my purse or car).

When I first signed up for this trip, I began to get a few details about things. One being that we get 2 checked bags which will both be full of stuff for the kids..wonderful, I love that idea! The next thing I read was that our personal items had to go in a 30lb. carry on. Well, alright..this will be really hard, but I think I could do that?? I will have to just shop for some really light weight luggage..lol. Well, I continued to detail search about this trip, b/c details just tend to settle my heart a little sometimes. Looking on the airline website I see this...carry on allowance..15lbs. What? Are you kidding me?? All my stuff for 10 days in Africa in a 15 lb. carry on. Could this be right? It was, the airline just changed their guidelines..of course they did. The young guy leading our trip is like yeah, just a backpack or something should be fine (gotta love how men can pack). They said we might be able to cheat a little on the wgt. and have some room in the checked bags. This was a definitely causing me a little anxiety at first, but the more I thought about it, the more excited I got!!

How blessed am I that I am stressing about putting an inkling of what I have (or think that I need) in a backpack for a trip that is only 10 days long??? I am sure a-lot of people in Africa could place ALL their belongings in a backpack. So what if I am a little grungy for a few days, maybe I won't have all the "comfort" things that I like to have, but you know what..that is more than alright. After all, I get to return home to literally truckloads of stuff, not a backpack full.

So, I usually pack for a weekend trip like I am going to a third world country, but now I will be packing for a third world country like I am going on an overnighter. Oh, gotta love it when he says get out of that box!

Better Late than Never

Alright, I know that I am soo behind on this starting a blog thing. But, I figure that at some point any good blog stalker should jump on board...right? I have had several people say that I should start a blog to journal about my upcoming mission trip to Africa. So, why not? After all, I have to say that this journey I am on was started in a large part because of some blogs I was following. So, maybe all that computer time was not a waste after all?? If I can use a blog to let others know what God is doing, then maybe I will give it a try.

I have a-lot of back-tracking to do to tell my story, so get ready for rambling posts that probably won't be in order or make much sense for awhile. (I am sure I just lost all 3 people that might even read this). I am hoping this will be a good place to keep track of my two precious boys too, as they are growing up way too fast.

With all that said, READY...SET... here we GO!